Monthly Archives: June 2013

Relationship Intervention

A local radio program has a weekly program called “relationship intervention.”  The basic premise is that Person A (who has a problem with Person B) calls into the program and explains the problem with Person B. The station then calls Person B and  they attempt to hash out the problem on the air.  It never works, and I am fairly certain that Person B is usually quite upset with Person A, but hey, that is a problem for another Relationship Intervention I suppose.

Alas, I wondered what would happen if I called in about Murphy.  You see Murphy has one big problem . . . he does not believe in personal space – at all.  See human, will beg for lovin.  See human lap, will cuddle.  See human face, will kiss.  If you don’t believe me, I present evidence . . .

Murphy Clinger    Murphy Needy  Murphy Uses Dads Head as a Pillow

Do you believe em now? I envisioned the conversation going like this . . .

Me: Hi Murphy!

Murphy: Hi Mom, Do you like my bow tie?

Me: Hi Murphy, Yes I do like your bow tie.  There is something I wanted to talk to you about.

Murphy:  Okay, Mom.  What is it? Do you want to talk about how dorable I am.  Because I am super dorable.  If I had tumbs, I would give my dorableness two tumbs up.

Me:  No, Murphy it isn’t that.

Murphy:  Okay, good Mom.  I was worried.

Me:  Well, Murphy I just wanted to tell you that you are not a lap dog.

Murphy:  WHAT?!?!?!?! No way.  That is not possible. Mom, pibbles are by definition lap dogs.  It is part of our DNAs.

Me:  Well, Murphy, you weigh 62 pounds, you are not lap-sized.

Murphy:  Oh, Mom, you are so silly, that is why I curl up in a pibble ball.  It is a special pibble trick.  When I curl up in a pibble ball, I become  lap-sized.  You have so much to learn mom, besides, who wouldn’t want to cuddle with this face.  I dare you, Mom, say no to this face . . .

It is so hard to be me.

Doesn’t anyone want to give me some lovin?

Me:  Oh alright, Murphy, let’s cuddle.

Murphy:  AWESOME!!! How bout some pibble kisses too?!?!?!?!

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